Welcome everybody to an Orange is the New Black Retrospective blog for seasons 1-4. I wrangled up some lovely ladies who were willing to spare some valuable free time to help me out with this. You can play along at home and leave a comment with your responses to these questions. I am Kent, and I am the only male in this discussion, so expect lots of conflicting perspectives. Anything written in bold will be my comments.
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- Let’s start off with an easy one. Has Piper become an unlikeable character for you?
Melanie: Not unlikable, but not my favorite.
Kelly: Yes. She has had good and bad times, but since the panty business she’s been ridiculous and for me, more unlikable.
Cece: Extremely. She’s always been my least favorite. (Wow, absolute least favorite? She’s high on that list for me.)
Kristi: She has most definitely become one of my least favorite characters.
Jamie: I would say more annoying than unlikable. She does a lot of stuff that pisses me off and annoys me. Such as thinking she’s top dog in there, her crying annoys me. (Yeah, excellent point about the crying. It’s absolutely dreadful.)
Kent: Yeah, really since midway through season 2. I got so sick of her, Larry, Alex, and Polly nonsense. It was some high school needy bulllllshit.
- Name your four favorite female characters, and two male character. They can be alive or dead. You don’t have to list 6, but I wanted the maximum to be 6.
Melanie: Female-Poussey, Red, Sophia, and Morello
Male-Pornstache, Luschek
Kelly: Red, Taystee, Poussey, Sophia, Nicky, Luschek
Cece: Female: Poussey, Red, Nikki, Daya. Men: Bennett and Luschek.
Kristi: Red, Lolly, Poussey, Lorna- Luschek and Caputo
Jamie: female: Nicki, Mei Chang, Red. Male:Cal Chapman, Luschek
Kent: I love the older ladies on this show, so my first 3 are Miss Rosa, Miss Claudette, and Frieda. The 4th presented a problem for me between Red, Crazy Eyes, and Lolly. I will go with Red because she likes to cook. The guys, well Caputo is my obvious choice. I feel that every girl is going to choose Luschek because that’s how Seth Rogen got popular. I honestly like Healy, Ceasar, and O’Neil. Let’s go with O’Neil. (By the way, I wrote that every girl was going to name Luschek prior to reading any comments. Seriously, douchey guys with hairy faces with no ambition who make girls laugh are just so uncreative. Seth Rogen and Chris Pratt really like your money. Douchey guys with no facial hair, that’s where it’s at. Also, I would have loved to have more diversity in this panel to see if maybe more Latinas or Black chicks got mentioned. Note, everybody loves Red and most girls love Poussey.)
- Name your least favorite character who isn’t supposed to be an antagonist. So don’t pick Vee from season 2, or Piscatella from season 4 as they were never intended to be well liked.
Melanie: All of the people who I thought of were made to be an antagonist in some way. I can’t think of an answer for this one.
Kelly: Bennett. I freaking loved Daya and him and boom, he disappears like a loser. Screw him. (You partially disappoint me, haha.)
Cece: Piper.
Kristi: Daya- I wanted to like her but she has become annoying to me.
Jamie: Watson is my least favorite. She’s a very irrelevant character who just shouts out pro black racist garbage. (Honestly, Watson is one of my faves, probably top 10. Normally I am anti all the hateful nonsense, but her backstory and the way that she has been treated backs up her philosophies. Perhaps season 5 will help lessen the hate, or possibly make it stronger. I can say that it strengthened my love for her, but I am only halfway through.)
Kent: Daya and Bennett. I loathe them, but since I have had to put up the most with Daya, she’s my choice. I really am not a huge fan of the Latinas in this show. Yoga Jones, Judy King, and Sofia are all not well liked by me either.
- Do you like the theme song for this show: “You’ve Got Time”?
Melanie: I do like it and think it is appropriate, but find myself fast forwarding through after the 2nd or 3rd episode. (In all fairness, when I started re-binge watching it, I listened to it the first time. After that I remembered how much I hated it, but timing the fast forward can be tricky on Netflix.)
Kelly: Yes! I sing it all the time!!! (Change that partial to a complete.)
Cece: I love it. Regina Spektor is awesome.
Kristi: I cant say I’ve ever really paid attention to it. I just fast forward through the opening do I guess it didn’t make much of an impression on me. (
Jamie: love it my daughter even sings it when it comes on.
Kent: Nay. I try to skip over it at the beginning of every episode. The song grates on me. Just shrieking at me. It’s like nails on a chalkboard. The WORST part is that when I try timing the fast forward, I often land on the highest, most shriekiest part of the song and it just makes me want to do awful things in a Jason mask with a machete.
- Aside from the theme song, what is your favorite song that they have used in the show?
Melanie: “Beautiful” sung by young Taystee. She sang the song to prospective foster/adoptive parents to try and impress them. It broke my heart. (I had forgotten all about that scene. It was really good.)
Kelly: Last Resort by Papa Roach, because I had to be “that person” who mentioned it. *insert laughing emoji* (Well, we are both “that person” or is persons? It fit the scene really well.)
Cece: Honestly not sure. I’ve forgotten and I just don’t recognize much of what I found when googling.
Jamie: I don’t have a favorite
Kent: “Too Dry To Cry” by Willis Earl Beal was in season 3 when Sofia went to SHU. I am also a big fan of “Last Resort” in the season 4 premiere, but they edited it for some inane reason. Tom Waits “Come On Up To the House” played during Cal’s wedding and was a perfect song. “Bitch Please II” by Eminem, Dre, Snoop, Xzibit, and Nate Dogg in the 3rd episode of season 4, fucking oustanding. “Don’t Fear The Reaper” playing when Rosa hit Vee was niiiice. Also, any of the gangsta rap style stuff, I totally enjoy. It’s my blog, I can break the rules and name multiple songs, or maybe it’s white privilege. This show fucks with my head.
- Do you miss Larry’s character (Piper’s boyfriend/fiance played by Jason Biggs) at all?
Melanie: No, he was annoying.
Kelly: Not at all! He was so annoying.
Cece: Yes. I love Jason Biggs. (Cece my friend, it appears that you are all alone on the Jason Biggs island. Don’t feel too bad. I may be alone on the Watson island.)
Kristi: Not at all. His character isn’t really relevant to whats going on anymore.
Jamie: not at all
Kent: No, his character was worthless and caused unneeded drama, which I kinda pointed out earlier. Also, when has Jason Biggs ever been funny? I am blown away that he got this role. Not a fan of his, but his character was awful. Never come back Larry! I did enjoy Larry’s parents though.
- There have been some deaths in the show. Talk about one, whether you liked it or hated it.
Melanie: I would say the one I “liked” was Vee- “Always so rude that one!” (I loved that line. One thing I kinda wished would happen is if the boy getting chemo with her was a little bit older, and then in a few seasons, he would become a CO for Litchfield.)
Hated- Poussey. It was incredible sad and very poignant. What a beautiful episode to tribute her character.
Kelly: I liked the death of the guy in the greenhouse with Alex (forgot his name). It brought together some women you’d never suspect to speak to each other in that prison. (Despite just rewatching the series, I never gave him a thought. Good answer.)
Cece: I loved Vee’s death. Rosa was a bad bitch.
Kristi: Poussey is the one that stands out most for me. She was one of my favorites and it was very unexpected.
Jamie: Rosa killing Vee was an amazing episode and as sad as it was to see Rosa go she went out in such a great way! Noone wanted to see Poussey die and in such a crap way they could’ve made it a better death scene then an elbow on the back of the neck
Kent: Vee’s death was the best because she was awful and Rosa was my favorite character. I also wish to give props to Tricia’s death in season 2, I believe. It was perfect to tie her story up. Not a happy moment, but it was the right decision. I gotta speak on Poussey’s death as few of you have brought it up. I loathed the scene for the heavy handedness of it. The writers had an opportunity to really make a statement by having a non-black person die this way to add to a conversation. Instead, they took the easy race bait, and then made Tastee act a fool. The fact that she is still bitching about Bayley rather than having her anger directed at any of the 3 people who were way more responsible, really bothers me. She should be made at Crazy Eyes because that’s what really started the big fight. Prior to that, Crazy Eyes may not have been so damn crazy if Humps hadn’t instigated the fight between Crazy and Kukudio. Also, Humps shouldn’t even have been acting this way if Piscatella did things the right way and brought it a loose cannon like Humps. The whole thing was kinda tactless. Yes, it gave us a great backstory of Poussey, but at what cost? Well when you watch season 5, we are still paying that price with Tastee. All to do a Black Lives Matter bit. Totally unnecessary. They should’ve killed Daya or Lorna. Now I shall step off of my soapbox as it is starting to crack under my immense weight.
- Name 3 characters whose backstory you thought was the best told.
Melanie: Crazy eyes, Blanca, Anita
Kelly: Poussey, Rosa, and Lolly
Cece: Taystee, Maria, and Suzanne ‘Crazy Eyes’
Kristi: Red, Poussey, and Lorna
Jamie: Rosa, Mei Chang, miss claudette
Kent: Miss Claudette, Crazy Eyes, and Lolly’s
I also want to say that I really liked everybody’s picks. The backstories are the absolute best part of this show to me. It used to be one of the best things that the Walking Dead did.
- Has the show gone downhill for you?
Melanie: I think Piper’s story line has gone downhill, but otherwise no.
Kelly: It just got very political which was rough to watch because half the humor of the show was gone. And then the death of Poussey, it was so tough to stick with it during the wait for Season 5. But I’m dedicated and I’ll be here watching as soon as it’s out! (Season 4 was a huge tunr off for the same reasons. Fortunately, season 5 is bringing funny back.)
Cece: Piper continues to suck. Also, my favorite character was killed off.
Kristi: Yes, and after watching Wentworth I am starting to lose interest. (What’s that you say? Wentworth eh? Geez, that sounds like a great opportunity for a blog. (Followed by a wink and a thumbs up).)
Jamie: I love the show so no it has not for me
Kent: Yeah, it has. Season 4 was bad. We are all fans here, but if we look at it objectively, season 1 & 2 were the best, then 3, then 4. That’s what we call a downward slide. The race baiting bullshit, Poussey’s awful death, Judy King, militant mother fuckers, over the top CO’s to try to paint CO’s in a bad light. It sucked big hairy monkey balls. They need a redemption. Season 5 should start with Daya shooting herself in the dome. I would be hooked again!
Bonus Deuce – Spoiler alert for question #1 those who haven’t finished season 4. #2 is spoiler free.
- Will Daya shoot anybody in season 5? If you say yes, who do you predict?
Melanie: I don’t think so.
Kelly: I’m not sure she actually will, but either a fellow Hispanic cast mate or Piscatella.
Cece: I feel like at the last moment she won’t. Someone else may.
Kristi: I don’t think she will.
Jamie: I don’t think she will someone else may
Kent: While I have my doubts, I’m willing to lose a good character if Daya shoots them and ends up in SHU where I never have to see her again. She’s basically the equivalent to Tara on the Walking Dead. I love both characters. They aren’t similar, but man, they are just……. I gotta move on.
- Name a character or two that you are looking forward to seeing this season. Probably best to pick some characters that you haven’t discussed yet.
Melanie: Frieda, she has some of the best one liners. So funny!
Kelly: Piper to see what her deal is after all this time, and Red.
Cece: I hope to see Bennett come back! Still crossing my fingers. Also, I’d like to see how everyone changes after Poussey’s death. (Don’t take this personally, you know, just like every other comment I have ever left you over the years, but I really am hoping that this particular wish doesn’t come true, unless it results in his immediate gruesome murder.)
Kristi: Id like to see more of Lolly. Id also like to see Ruby Rose come back for a few. (I love Lolly, so I am on board with that. Ruby Rose is in a movie coming out called Meg. it has Jason Statham, Rainn Wilson (Dwight from the Office, or the other guy in House of 1,000 Corpses that wasn’t fat Chris Hardwick), and Cliff Curtis (the dad from Fear the Walking Dead). I just looked this up 5 days ago.)
Jamie: will Bennett show up?? (OK, I hope that once this is posted, somebody leaves me a message or a comment about the fascination or love for this character. I simply don’t get it. Is it because he was involved in the only hetero love story, and chicks like that shit? Is it because he was a good guy? I guess I need some perspective, so I am asking for it.)
Kent: Frieda is my obvious choice. I’m hoping that we get a follow up on Healy and Lolly.I want more Natalie Fig and Ceasar as well. Plus, more lesbian scenes. Look at how great that stuff was in season 1. All the time. Now it’s race wars and evil men. Get the fuck up off your high horse, and make some compelling TV again or else I’m out. If I want to see this nonsense, there are many, many ways to see it. I want to have compelling drama with some good one liners, and boobs! I don’t feel like I am asking for too much here. Please, stop making this show worse. That’s really what I am begging for because if they continue down this road, they will lose fans. Also, do more with Chang damnit!
With that being said, I hope that you have all enjoyed this retrospective. Hopefully, by the end of the month, maybe we can do a season 5 blog if enough of these lovely ladies will join me. This felt very much like an AHS reunion for the girls that help me, so it felt very nice to hear from them again as a group, and it was great to have a newbie in Jamie. Kristi, she just hangs around because we watch a lot of the same shit.
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